1: Senate seeks a Compromise on Financial Reform Bill
The article includes a picture of Obama giving a speech with arms outstretched.  The imagery gives the impression that safety rests under the wings of Barry.  That, with the needed change comes hope…or some bullshit like that.  Anyway, the article addresses the “need” for sweeping financial reform so we “never” have another financial meltdown.  You have to love reform.  How can we forget the recent health care reform bill.  The one that was supposed to extend coverage to millions AND save money..wait, whats this..it will COST more…good thing we find that out AFTER it is passed.  It further goes on to declare the need for a new agency to protect consumers in the marketplace.  Oh another agency!  This is fantastic…(See headline 3) Other statements in the article say that “we need to reign in Wall St. risky practices.”  Correct me if I’m wrong here but the majority of the financial crisis was created by defaults on subprime mortgages.  Those mortgages were urged by Congress, so everyone had the “right” to home ownership.  Makes about as much sense as taking a dook in my front yard.

2) Goldman, White House ties raise eyebrows
So Goldman is shackin’ up at the the White House…Gee I am shocked.  These “Wall St. Fatcats” who need to be reigned in to avoid another financial crisis, donated about a million bucks to Obamas 08 Presidential run.  Then while under investigation from the SEC, their CEO visited the White House numerous times.  SEC..we’ll cover those guys in headline 3, where they’re on top of their game.

3) SEC Workers Were Watching Porn as Economy Tanked
In their defense, it probably is more exciting watching a wobbly H than plummeting stock charts.  I digress, back to the main point of the current financial reform push.  The Administration is saying we need more oversight, so we don’t have another financial crisis.  I can see it now…the SEC offices don’t have cubicles but coin operated booths where they put in gold coins (tax payer $) and the curtain raises to show pole dancers holding top financial firms latest earnings reports.  As the SEC execs sit in the shadows smoking stogies they contemplate the risks of these fat cats.  The curtain closes as the timer runs out.  Question, if Goldman was in bed with the White House, would the SEC watch?  Maybe if they got to 2nd base on a webcam.  This is a system that I have confidence won’t let another meltdown happen. (sarcasm)

4) B of A wants to let jobless skip house payments
Because we simply cannot let those people miss a payment.  I mean times are tough.  So tough in fact that Uncle Sam has extended benefits to 99 weeks by extending payroll taxes.  The incentives to be unemployed are starting to outweigh the pros of being employed.  I should just buy an Xbox and get fired, life would be great.  And what does BofA have to fear, if they run out of money, I’m sure Uncle Sam would be glad to step in with an IOU.

So since I believe everything I read I can only conclude that we need more financial reform and agency oversight  so we can have more agencies who watch porn and more corporations who are in bed with politicians.  And just in case a company does something where they will lose revenue, Uncle Sam will be there like a nurturing mother because they are “too big to fail.”   Actually it seems the problem more lies with Washington.  Can I get a hell yeah for lobbyist, politician reform?

The image of the Far Side cartoon of the guy pushing on the door labeled “Pull” pops into my head.

So stupid people, we here at Aquapasture Industries have teamed up with an Indonesian sweat shop to offer you some new apparel so those of us in public can spot you and avoid you, therefore saving everyone precious time.  Fear not common sensers, we haven’t forgotten about you.  You’ll have the opportunity to purchase our “Constipated Holmes” shirt.  When you encounter stupids, just tell them to read the shirt when they finally come around to making a conclusion, forming an opinion, or figure out how to make toast.  Of course the shirt may throw them for a loop and they’ll spend hours trying to figure it out.  Between you and me it means, No Shit Sherlock.  Oh one last thing stupids, we’ll need your social security number when you place your order.  We apologize for this inconvenience, it’s a Nigerian commerce regulation.

• It’s not a Republican or Democratic issue but an absolute demand for a change in the fiscal direction of this country
• We need Government and taxes, but the current taxation and spending is beyond out of control
• “Where were you in the Bush years?”  I’ve never like big government but the last 12 months have seen unprecedented growth and spending of Uncle Sam.
• The “Tea Bag” jokes by some are about as original as a knock knock joke.
• This is THE most important crisis we face.  Pretty basic, the economy supports everything.

In a show of ultimate Liberal feel goodness, I found these protesters a block away from the TEA Party.  Sure, stopping Global Warming and stopping executions might make you feel all warm and fuzzy but it seems to me that they are oblivious to the real crisis’ we’re facing .  I only hope their sign was on 100% recycled paper and that we buy carbon credits for any executions via gas chamber that we perform.

Links
TEA Party Website
101 TEA Party Slogans

I’ll be on the Galleywinter Musicfest feed, to keep those who care up to speed on my good behavior sans any tweets made by my friend Jack.